Thirteen Years on April 10, 2012, my mother passed away. She had spent a lot of time in the hospital, so it wasn’t sudden. But that didn’t make it easier. Mother’s are always siad to be the glue that holds families together. I remember sitting by my grandma, Gring, and her asking, “Sarah, why? Why Poppy and now her?” The only answer I had for her was, “I don’t know.”
I still don’t know why Momma had to leave 13 years ago. I won’t ever know why the things that quickly followed her passing had to happen either. All I know is that I caught a glimpse of a beautiful life and legacy that both her and my Gring left this past weekend and that made my heart truly smile-despite some exhaustion.
We finally got to make the trip to my Aunt Lori’s. I remember going to feed the baby lambs when I was a little girl. My girls love going up on the buggy and feeding the lambs as well…full circle. The difference is there are now chickens there too! But I am in love with chickens, so it works! I must have gotten my love from Aunt Lori, or my mom secretly loved them-not sure! We got to help with the 54 chicks that came early to my aunts. It was wonderful.
We also got to have a cousin night. And we just chit chatted away. It was nice-the way family just can feel so natural and loving. Despite growing up in homes, cousins just always seem to understand and love you despite faults, despite issues between parents or grandparents…they are family and will be there for you. It was the comfort my heart needed this week. God’s timing ended up being perfect once again.
Will I ever understand why I lost my mom at just 25 years old, and why my Gring had to lose her firstborn daughter? No. My girls should have the chance to know Granny Lisa, and Charlene (my cousin’s new baby) should be spoiled by Aunt Lisa, just like my girls are spoiled by Aunt Kris, who even organized an Easter Egg hunt despite not being there!
Is it fair? No–and no my dad never told me life would be fair. The comfort I take is in knowing both Gring and Momma are in Heaven with no more pain or scars and I will see them again. and I honestly hope we all take time this Easter to reflect upon that and not just Easter Bunnies and Chicks…but as we gather with Family, remember what Easter is all about. He died for us–a brutal death–to cover our sins and rose again 3 days later. I do not fear death. Are things always easy? No–I feel like life unravels at times, but He has it all under control and He has the perfect timing–as once again shown by the timing in this trip. Exactly when my heart needed a hug to make me smile.
Tags: Baby Chicks, Chicks, country, Faith, family, God